The Understanding That I Have Nothing To Give of My Own

A few weeks ago, I was writing a chapter evaluation for my Missions class, specifically addressing the financial shortage in supporting missionaries. But the problem is not a lack of monetary funds, especially in the United States. More so, many people just to do not give (or give generously). As a generalization, it seems like people are very protective of their money, and are hesitant to give their money to anyone or anything else (because it is their money).

Oddly though, one of the richest men in the world seemed to understand reality. Not only did he have monetary wealth, but he had power, influence, and success in every aspect. Towards the end of his life, he prayed to God in the presence of the nation he ruled and said, "Everything comes from you, and we have given you only what comes from your hand" (1 Chronicles 29:14).

What would change if the reality that all things you supposedly "possess" (e.g. time, money, intelligence, skills, resources, etc.) were actually God's and he was allowing you to be a steward of it?

The Consistency of the Gospel in Personal Uncertainty

The last four months have been extremely difficult. My thoughts about the future, vocation, and seminaries caused great concern and uncertainty. There were days I would wake up feeling certain of what to do, but going to bed thinking something completely different. One verse has continued to encourage me in this season, Psalm 119:92: "If your law had not been my delight, I would have perished in my affliction."

Yes, this may seem to be an odd verse. Why would anyone delight in the law (Bible)? For me, this set my mind in a tumultuous time on the one thing that is consistent, the Gospel. The question then is, what is the Gospel?

Simply, the Gospel is the truth that Jesus Christ died on the cross to pay the penalty for our sins. But there is more. Our sin has a real consequence, eternal separation from God. Without Christ, there is no way (e.g. good works) we can overcome the great gulf our sin creates between God and us. But there is no strength, confidence or security in intellectually knowing these things. We must each receive Christ as our personal Savior and Lord. Truly then, my hope in uncertainty is not in myself, but in my relationship with Jesus Christ and His unexplainable love, compassion, and truth.

Discipline Leads to Freedom?

A friend shared a great quote on his blog on Discipline. Check it out here.

Don't Waste Your Life by Lecrae

I just heard the song "Don't Waste Your Life" by Lecrae this morning. Once again, the lyrics are inspired by Scripture with an obvious passion for the Gospel and seeking Christ as our treasure. Check it out here.

You can preorder the entire Rebel album here.

Apple Pie...Eaten by Appachen

This is what an apple pie looks like after my Appachen (grandpa) gets a hold of it. He seems to like the middle a bit more than the crust (he says that others enjoy the crust so he was saving it for them).

The funny part is when he is confronted with the evidence, he cannot help but break out laughing. That is the beauty of being old or really young, you can get away with things that would usually cause people to be upset with a simple chuckle.

So you know what he looks like, here is my grandpa with his great grand daughter Meghan.



I do not want to be unfair, so here is my Ammachy (grandma) with Meghan too (I apologize for the glare)...


Ok...one more. This is Josiah, my brother Justin, Meghan, and my sister-in-law Lisa (not Josiah/Meghan's parents).

This is not a small parfait...it is a baby

Kyle was sad.

New Macbook and Macbook Pros?

According to this it seems like new Macs could be coming as soon as September. I'm hoping it is true.

Binil's Testimony and Funeral Video/Slideshow

The following video is Binil's testimony of his journey with Christ. I plead with you, reading these words, to take a few minutes and watch the clips.



The next video is similar to the one above but to music (in an incredible way). In addition, there are a good amount of pictures and a humbling quote at the end.

Jesus Wept

He really did.

I'm glad Jesus felt the emotionally pain of losing a friend on earth. Here is the story, from John 11.

Jesus was going about his life of ministry with his disciples when he was informed his dear friend Lazarus was sick (vs. 3). Although news of the illness came as "new" information, Jesus knew that he was going to die (vs. 14). Nonetheless, Jesus traveled to Bethany to see his close friends Mary and Martha, Lazarus' sisters.

For anyone who has experienced a sudden/tragic death, you know what the scene is like at the family's house. There were tons of people at Mary and Martha's place consoling them (vs. 19, 31). They must have been distraught, weeping greatly, and likely in shock.

The shedding of countless tears.
Random verbalizations of frustration/sadness/hopelessness.
Moments of composure that leads to questions of "What if?"
People coming in and going out of the house.
An overall sense of loss and uneasiness.




When Martha heard that Jesus was near she ran to meet him. She shared the sorrow on her heart and the hope, that if Jesus had only arrived earlier, Lazarus would have lived. Mary, after being informed by Martha, runs to Jesus' feet and states "Lord, if you had been here my brother would not have died (vs. 32)."

There must have been a sharp pain Jesus felt at that very moment. "...he was deeply moved in his spirit and greatly troubled (vs. 33)."

So Jesus asks them to take him to the tomb. As the group walks towards Lazarus' permanent resting place, the firmness and finality of death must have increasingly become a greater reality with each step. Soon enough, they were at the tomb, with the smell of death evident in the air (he had been dead for four days-vs. 17).

I imagine Jesus separating himself from the group and approaching the tomb alone. In front of him is a stone symbolizing the physical reality of death. Behind him stands a group of people sobbing and heart broken. In the midst of all this, Jesus breaks down and begins to weep (vs. 35). The emotion, shock, and sorrow had penetrated his spirit, producing tears that expressed the unexplainable emotions of the soul.

Today, as I remember Binil's passing, I find great comfort knowing that the Rock that I cling to, especially in moments of deepest sorrow and pain, understands what I (and maybe you) am going through.

He has been there. He has wept.

Binil Mathew Samuel (1985-2007)

The following has been a part of my Facebook profile for the last year:

The person to the right is Binil Samuel. He passed away in a car accident on August 6th, 2007 at the age of 22.

He was not a perfect person. In fact, his sin destined him to eternal separation from Christ.

However, in his abbreviated life, he was passionate about the one thing that saved him from his own sin, Jesus Christ.

Binil did not do enough pious sacraments to earn heaven. He placed the destiny of his eternity on Jesus Christ's death and resurrection.

Here are a few characteristics that set Binil apart from the rest of the crowd:
• He was witty and funny yet able to have deep, serious conversation. This is a balance that few ever master. Some are natural comedians but struggle with discussing the tougher issues of life. Others are just the opposite. Binil was blessed with a personality that was both/and.
• He cared about people. It was over a year ago now that the 35W Bridge collapsed in Minneapolis. Binil was one of the first people to call and see how I was doing. This may have been expected for the closest of friends, but Binil and I had not seen each other in months.
• More than just a phone call, Binil had a huge heart for the kids at the Navjeevan Center. Most of these kids are born of women from the red light district in Mumbai, India.
• He had a bigger picture in mind when it came to life. One of the last emails we exchanged, he mentioned how he was about to start his professional career as a consultant with Accenture. Here was his last line in regards to the job:

The best part is I get 25 PTO, not including 9 holidays, and my future manager has said people take it all their PTO at once usually, so the possibility of me being able to travel on missions annually is a very reasonable reality.

The reason I say these things is to give you a sliver as to how incredible of a person he was. But the hope of all this is not to draw more attention to him. No, it is to point the glory towards Christ.

For the next few posts, I hope to work through a few passages that have brought affirmation, realization, and encouragement over the past year.

***If you have Facebook, you can check out his testimony on my profile.